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The sum of all my problems  today is the inability to sit quietly
 alone on deck 4 and watch the dolphins 

WYSIWYG-What you see is what you get- I do not create the Caribbean blue ocean, the white powder sandy beaches. Rather they are gifts to me. What I write about   comes out of gratitude for being t/here.

Traveling gives me the sense of inhabiting my own life. Yet, when I was an AmeriCAN’T, I  didn’t even renew my passport, and never got inside of  my own life.
It’s as if my rich Uncle Sam has already written the script for me, Thou shalt be comfortable---The payoff was that I got to buy and do nice things like trips to Disney World, Las Vegas  and The Mall.

This is walking the painted   horizontal (stuff and things) line, slaves to credit cards and debt. It’s almost a rule that you can’t get enough of what you never wanted in the first place.
The majority of my time in the USA, I have never been remotely anywhere without electric lights. I’ ve  rarely  been quiet for a whole day.  In fact, all of my  “problems” simply   stemmed  from the inability to sit alone quietly at the beach or where ever. Doing this at sea is a forced sequester that  revives my sense of time, and move me ( up or down) the  vertical (spirit) line towards the saints or demons.  

It was so astonishing that I received 26,000 hits+ to date  on Youtube;
 Nightline and Good Morning America licensed my “content” for their broadcasts.
I remember, when the Carnival Splendor was dead in the water for 4 days in 2010: no plumbing, no electricity or hot food or water—most of the 3,200 passengers were a bunch of babies, complainers, angry, some crying and shaking their fists.  When you fall in America, even on a cruise ship, it’s not that far down. We had the Ronald Regan aircraft carrier airlift 24 pallets of supplies onboard. When we got back to San Diego, they put me up for 3 days in The Hyatt, refunded the cruise and gave a free one. Why, because we are Americans and ENTITLED to that.

The legacy of expectations about who we are is cookie cutter from our parents, our culture—it’s a tradition which may or may not resonate with me, depending on my mood swings. It’s hard to go out of your CZ, comfort zones, and yet when you get the call” Anyplace but here” and “I want to be surprised”, you have to.

Sure, you can put the fun in this dysfunction. And dedicate yourself to living out these stories for an entire lifetime, with a little help from your friends-Generation Rx. Or you coulkd break down, then breakthrough and be an outlaw-and tell your own story.
Defying these storylines  is cultural betrayal and family rebellion. That’s the difference between doing the blue chip things-living out the myth  and living out autobiographically. 

We are all living holograms, and can find answers on the quest simply by telling our own stories, by writing our autobiography—and discovering our personal mythology. I don’t have one part of me that writes and another part that lives. My posts are just reports of a journey in progress.

Cozumel-3 years ago


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